The Forty Rules of Love by Elif Shafak Inspired by Rumi's Teachings

The 40 Rules of Love from Elif Shafak's novel, inspired by Rumi's teachings and Shams of Tabriz, focus on love, spirituality, and personal growth

Rule 1:

How we see God is a direct reflection of how we see ourselves. If God brings fear and blame, it means there is too much fear and blame inside us. If we see God as full of love and compassion, so are we.

Rule 2:

The path to Truth is a labor of the heart, not of the head. Make your heart your primary guide—not your mind. Meet, challenge, and ultimately conquer your nafs (ego) with your heart.

Rule 3:

You can study God through everything and everyone in the universe because God is not confined to a mosque, synagogue, or church. If you are still looking for God in religious institutions, you may find only a semblance of Him.

Rule 4:

The deeper you delve into your soul, the closer you draw to God. Through deep contemplation, your connection with the Divine will strengthen.

Rule 5:

It is futile to ask questions like "Why am I here?" or "What will happen after I die?" because the answers are already within you. You just need to unravel them.

Rule 6:

Love cannot be explained or defined; it simply is. Love is the water of life. And a lover is a soul of fire. The universe turns differently when fire and water meet.

Rule 7:

The universe is one being. Everything and everyone is connected through an invisible web. Hurt one part, and you hurt the whole.

Rule 8:

Patience does not mean to endure passively. It means to look at the end of a process and know it will be worth it.

Rule 9:

You must learn to let go of your attachments. Suffering comes not from love itself but from the barriers we build against it.

Rule 10:

East, west, north, south, make no difference. No matter your destination, make sure each journey is inward.

Rule 11:

You will be tested through hardships, loss, and betrayal. See them as gifts that help your soul grow.

Rule 12:

Do not dwell in the past or worry about the future. The present moment is all that matters. Stay present.

Rule 13:

God is not a distant deity watching us from afar. He is part of us, and we are part of Him. He is closer than our veins.

Rule 14:

Strive for humility and modesty. The true seeker knows they are but a drop in the ocean of creation.

Rule 15:

Every human being is a work in progress, waiting to be completed. Don’t judge others.

Rule 16:

Nothing should stand between you and God. Not imams, priests, or rabbis; not traditions, dogmas, or scriptures.

Rule 17:

Do not ask why things happen as they do. Instead, find the hidden lesson in every event.

Rule 18:

It’s easy to love the perfect ones. Love the flawed, the unkind, and the ordinary to experience divine love.

Rule 19:

Don’t attempt to control life. Allow life to flow as it is meant to.

Rule 20:

When a true lover of God comes into your life, they will break all your chains.

Rule 21:

True power lies in surrendering to the Divine. Let go of your arrogance and your need to control.

Rule 22:

Do not seek God in the past or future. He is right here, in the moment.

Rule 23:

You must accept life with its dualities: the sweet and the bitter, the joy and the sorrow.

Rule 24:

Ego is a veil between man and God. The more you let go of your ego, the closer you get to Him.

Rule 25:

We are all in constant evolution. Don’t resist change.

Rule 26:

Hell is not punishment; it is the absence of God’s love.

Rule 27:

Seek the company of those who bring out the best in you.

Rule 28:

Even in the face of criticism or failure, continue to walk the path of love.

Rule 29:

Do not see the differences between others as flaws. Accept everyone as they are.

Rule 30:

Be like a tree; stay grounded, but extend your branches toward Heaven.

Rule 31:

Surrender your attachment to the material world. It is fleeting and ultimately unimportant.

Rule 32:

A lover must be willing to sacrifice themselves for the beloved. In love, there is no ego, pride, or self-interest.

Rule 33:

Do not define yourself by external labels or achievements. You are more than that.

Rule 34:

True freedom comes when you live by love and not by fear.

Rule 35:

Listen to your soul. It knows the truth better than your mind ever will.

Rule 36:

Even when the whole world turns away, a true lover remains steadfast in their love.

Rule 37:

Do not despair. Every wound is a doorway to healing and transformation.

Rule 38:

You cannot understand divine love without understanding human love.

Rule 39:

Love is not about possession or control. It’s about freedom and growth.

Rule 40:

Be like the sun for grace and mercy. Be like the night to cover others’ faults. Be like flowing water for generosity.